it was the year of reckless love. i was being broken down and built up at the same time, in a way only God can. being made to dance with my fears while at the same time facing the “idea” of being me and that being enough, and in fact, if i’d dare, to be truly amazing if would just say “yes”…
there’s this thing where people say this is their year of yes; saying yes to everything: every new opportunity to learn, to travel, to experience great and beautiful things. and that’s amazing but this was not what my yes was about. it was my yes to God. yes to truly getting to know Him and to actually trusting Him with my life. it seems simple enough, but what that yes meant for me was saying yes to relinquishing control and saying no to fear and no to self-doubt, and for me that was hard; we had been faithful friends. its hard to say good bye to things that have become a part of you even when they have never been good for you.. because what they have been, is certain and constant and who doesn’t need that?
but i said yes, and my life hasn’t been the same. truthfully, it’s never been this good! and it’s felt really good before… well, for where i was and what i knew — the thing about darkness is that after a while your eyes adjust and you can start to see again, and before you know it, you no longer need or miss the light to be able to make your way around, to feel as if you are okay, that is, until it shines on you again. that’s when the true struggle begins, because as good as that feels, familiarity is a comfortable drug, and your old friends, doubt and fear, hold on tight, not wanting to let you go… maybe that’s why its taken me till now to write this blog and hit the “publish” button.
it was the year of reckless love. that was 2017. i was binge-watching TED Talks and God said Aiesha, don’t worry who thinks it’s too deep, or too much, or even makes no sense. write the blog and call it “effects of a beautiful space”.
i grappled with it, finding plenty of “good” reasons to leave it on my maybe-oneday list… and then, then, there was Corona, and i didn’t have a choice. i didn’t need another nudge i would ignore. every part of me could see and sense that people needed an immersion of beauty, an escape, a promise of something more and they needed it now, and it hasn’t left me. it reverberates through my cells. I believe if you’ve gotten this far, then you likely feel this way too, and so, this blog is for you.
every week i will share with you about beauty, how in the world I became obsessed with it, so good at creating it, and why i believe with all of my heart it is as fundamental to living an abundant life, right next to the air you breathe, the food you eat, the moves you make and the thoughts you hold…
till then… i pray you will open your eyes and your heart to experience something beautiful every day of the coming week, and if you’re feeling brave, that you will be the beauty that the world needs to see today.
stay safe and God bless!
P.S. if you know you need some more beauty in your life, subscribe to the blog here! thank you!